Six weeks of quarantine. Looking back on it, I have more positives than negatives. But the gravity of the situation amazes me. Never in my wildest dreams did I think it’d be possible to essentially shut down America and other countries around the world. It’s like something out of a movie. The first week I kept waking up throughout the night wondering if quarantine and COVID 19 were real. Then, week after week reality sunk in. 

I loved spending time with Lauralie. We did crafts, she became fully potty trained, I cooked and we spent a lot of time outside. It was great. Her schedule was the same between her father and I. Therefore not much changed for her, except for a little extra time with me. When I didn’t have her, I’d either go visit her, sleep and drink all day and getting grocery shopping done to prepare for her return. 

I ended up moving into a condo that I wanted for over a year at the very end of quarantine. I had ample time to move, clean and decorate. COVID training at work began earlier this week. It broke my heart to have to leave Lauralie and I missed her so much. It’s still an adjustment to go from having all of our days together, to going back to work. 

Working in a restaurant during the current pandemic will be interesting. We don’t know what’s going to happen. As our restaurant and beach prepare to open next week, there is a level of uncertainty. Will our new policies and procedures (including wearing face masks all shift) truly keep us safe? Will our normal business return? Will we become too busy and lose control due to our guest count restrictions? Will our staff be safe and happy?

Throughout these past few weeks, I think of what Lauralie’s childhood will be like moving forward. Will she be able to go to Disney as frequently as before? Will she ever be able to casually attend a concert or a fair? Will she know what a buffet is? Will she be able to experience sleepovers or know a world without face masks and head counts? At this point no one knows. 

My thoughts have also turned to people who have been devastated by COVID 19. Death has surrounded us. Lives have been lost. Jobs have been lost. Homes have been lost. Money and resources have become scarce for a lot of people. Fear has replaced smiles and disrupted families. My heart goes out to all. And I am grateful for our essential workers and  medical staff that have worked and sacrificed to keep America going.

With stay at home orders, I can only imagine how many people are finally forced to face their lives and themselves. No masks or shields available in that situation. No “beards”, makeup or jobs to run to in order to hide you from you. Only our authentic selves are on display whether we want them to be or not. I hope people have been able to do some soul searching and have taken time to realize what is truly important in their lives. 

I’ve learned how independent and how much of a loner I truly am. I’m grateful to have had time to spend with Lauralie and to be able to bask in the love and light of motherhood. I took the initiative to set up my apartment and put furniture together and set up some things on my own that I would have never done before. I cooked more than I have in years. I taught Lauralie to say her prayers every night. 

As I sit on my new blue couch, I wonder what the world holds next for all of us. I wonder what lasting impact this will have on ourselves, our children, the economy and our day to day lives. When, where and how will I vacation next? What will preschool be like for my daughter? Will she have a party for her 3rd birthday? All of our questions will be answered in time. Time heals all.  

Lauralie upset she couldn’t go into the park that she usually frequents on her bike ride.

Published by Janee

I am a working mom and a writer. I love the sunshine and writing. When I’m not here, I’m on a fun adventure with my daughter! Find us on YouTube at Janee Murray!

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